So grateful to be a mom to these beautiful 4 children!! They teach me so much everyday!
I was asked to give a talk on Mother's Day in our church which at first I wasn't thrilled about but it gave me a chance to reflect on all the women who have been mothers to me and my children over the years. I am so grateful to be surrounded and blessed by so many great women in my life.
Here is some of what I shared:
I
was asked to speak about the talk given by Sherri Dew back in 2001 called “Are
We Not All Mothers?” And as I
have been thinking about this talk the last couple weeks there are 2 main ideas
that have stood out to me.
1. We are all mothers! No matter if you
have born children or not. We as women are all mothers and that divine role was
given to us by Heavenly Father.
2. A mother LOVES and she LEADS……those 2
words….LOVING and LEADING….summarize all aspects of a mother’s role.
No matter
what our circumstances are we are all mothers and those God-given traits of
motherhood that are within us can be used to mother those around us. We can be
mothers to our own children, we can mother our grandchildren, we can be a
mother to nieces and nephews, we can be mothers to our friend’s children, we
can mother the children we teach in church, we can have a motherly influence on
anyone that the Lord has put in our path.
I am
grateful for the many women in my life who have been mothers both to me & to
my children.
1) My own mother. How can I give a talk
on mother’s day with my mom in the audience and not acknowledge her and the way
she loves and the way she leads. My mother’s love has been shown in endless ways
over the years…..when I was younger it came mostly through countless hours of service…..through
cleaning, and making meals, and doing laundry, reading stories and singing
songs, being a taxi driver, a referee, a nurse, a teacher, etc…..that love continues
and now she gives advice, she watching my children, she praying for her
children and fasts for them, and since I live close by I am still the lucky
recipient of my mother’s meals. Love shown in endless amounts of ways. My mom
leads by example. She is kind, and soft spoken, and one of the most selfless
people I know. I see her serve her family, her neighbors, her friends, her
visiting teachers, and anyone else so willingly. My mom helps to mother my children.
My kids love her. Grandma always comes first…..before mom and before dad. Going
to grandma’s house is always a special treat. She loves them and leads them in
ways that I can’t.
2) My mother-in-law. She is a great
example of so many things. But one of the things my mother-in-law has taught me
is that we can all reach out and help “mother” someone outside our immediate
family. Several years ago she recognized that her niece was in a difficult
circumstance at home. So she moved her niece here to Bartlesville, into her
home and showed her the love and spiritual leading that she needed at that
time. I’m sure that wasn’t an easy thing for either of them but with a little
patience and understanding and lots of love it turned into an amazing blessing.
3) My Sisters and Sisters-in-law: In
their own way Aunts can be “mothers” to their nieces and nephews. My kids are
very blessed in this way especially because they have several aunts that live
close by. They have aunts who will come to their soccer games or show up at
their bake sale, or take them out for ice-cream, or paint their nails, or play
games with them or read them books. I am grateful for my sisters and
sister-in-laws who build those relationships with my kids and in essence
“mother” them because there may come a time when one of my kids may reach out
to them for help or advice.
4) Primary Teachers: I think primary is
one of the best places to be serving in the church. In primary the gospel is
simple and pure and the children are beautiful, and funny, and fidgety, and
honest, and eager to learn the gospel. I am thankful for the many wonderful
primary teachers that my kids have had over the years. I know Austin has loved
his teachers but he isn’t as vocal as Mikayla. I can tell you every primary
teacher she has had from Sis. Highland as a sunbeam, to Sister Nichols, Then
the Romines for 2 years, and now Sister Bayless. Mikayla doesn’t hide how much
she adores her primary teachers because over the years she has mentioned little
things like wanting her teachers to come to her house, or to her birthday
party, or wanting to write notes to them. Last year for teacher spotlight, when
Mikayla was asked what she loved about her primary teachers she responded with
“they are nice and they sometimes bring candy and I know
that they love me”. She knows that her
Primary teachers love her. Primary teachers make an impact on our children more
often than we realize. And sometimes they can reach a child in some ways better
than we as their mothers can. Primary teachers love and lead our children so
thank you to past, current, and future teachers for helping to “mother” my children.
5) Young Women Leaders: Sister Dew
shares this….”I was thrilled recently to see one of my youth leaders for the
first time in years. As a teenager who had absolutely no self-confidence, I
always sided up to this woman because she would put her arm around me and say
‘You are just the best girl’ She loved me, so I let her lead me. How many young
men and women are desperate for your love and leadership? Do we fully realize
that our influence as mothers in Israel is irreplaceable and eternal?” I remember having wonderful young women
leaders when I was a youth, Sister Harriet Hood being one of them. She was
always so warm, and friendly, and kind and quick to put her arm around me and
encourage me or ask how I was. She always gave great lessons and brought the
spirit into the room. In her own way, she “mothered” me by loving me and
teaching me and leading me which is why to this day she still has a special
place in my heart. Sister Dew says “Every time we build the faith or reinforce
the nobility of a young woman or man, every time we love or lead anyone even
one small step along the path, we are true to our endowment and calling as
mothers and in the process we build the kingdom of God.”
I chose to
share these personal examples of women who have had a motherly influence in my
life to illustrate the fact that we as women are all mothers no matter our
circumstance and there is endless opportunities for us to reach out and love,
and lead, and be a motherly influence on others.
I would like
to close with the idea that “we are doing better than we think we are” as
Jeffrey R. Holland puts it. As women and
mothers it is easy to get discouraged, to feel inadequate, to feel we are not
doing enough, that we should be doing better. I know there have been many many
times when I have felt that way.
But there
are a couple things that others have said that often come to my mind.
The first is
from a friend who used to live in this ward. Her name is Becca Meacham. She
once got up and bore her testimony sharing how she often wishes she could do
more or be more helpful to the Lord in serving and accomplishing His work. Then
she mentioned the scripture that talks about how when we do it unto others we
do it unto Christ and how everyday as a mother in her own home she feeds the
hungry, and clothes the naked, and takes care of the poor and needy, and
administers unto the sick. “
And it may
seem like a silly comparison but her saying that has stuck with me over the
years. Because often a mother’s work may feel small and unimportant. It often
feels tedious and repetitive. But we as women and mothers are doing the Lord’s
work in whatever way that presents itself when we sacrifice our time and
personal desires to help take care of, and love, and teach and lead our own
children or another’s children. Who in actuality are all His children.
When I feel
discouraged, I also think about the words from Elder Holland in one of the
Mormon messages that I have watched several times. He said “There is nothing
more important in this world than participating so directly in the work and
glory of God. May I say to mothers collectivity in the name of the Lord. You
are magnificent. You are doing terrifically well. He is blessing you and he
will bless you. Especially when your days and your nights may be the most
challenging. Rely on him, rely on him heavily, rely on him forever and press foreword
with a steadfastness in Christ having a perfect brightness of hope.”
Let us
never forget that we are all mothers. The calling of motherhood given to us is
holy and divine. The Lord has placed His trust in us that we will love and lead
His children back to Him. I know that these things are true!
